How to Let Emotions Pass Through You

Somewhere along the way, we were taught to hide our emotions, cut our emotions short, or block them out altogether. This was told to us in messages like “toughen up”, “it’s not that bad”, “you’re being dramatic”, “calm down”, “you’re overreacting”.

I’m calling MAJOR BS on this. And here’s why.

When we block out our emotions they get stuck inside us. This means you are carrying fragmented pieces of blocked emotions around with you and you may hear yourself saying things like “I just feel so weighed down right now”, “I don’t have the energy to do anything”, “I’m worn out”, etc… Your mind and body connection are real and it is deep. These messages you’re brushing over are signs that you need to allow these emotions to be felt and passed through you.


  1. The next time you feel triggered, stop. Observe the feeling that you are having. Ask yourself why you are feeling this way. Where did this feeling originate from? Childhood? Traumatic life experience? Developed over time by someone else reinforcing this insecurity? Trace it back.

    What is a trigger? A trigger is when you have a BIG emotional reaction to normal activity.

  2. Once you’ve identified where this stemmed from, sit with it. Reflect on this. Journal about it, write out your history with these emotions. Write out the last time you felt this emotion. Did you push it out? Did you stop yourself from crying? Did you allow yourself to scream into a pillow? Or did you cut the emotion off and continue on? If you did the latter, now is the time to let the emotion come to the surface.
  3. Typically by spending time and reflecting on this emotion, it will come up and pass naturally. You may begin to cry. Allow it. You may feel like a ball of frustration if so, scream into the pillow, go on a walk, run, etc… allow yourself to feel this.

This takes practice. This is not a one and done exercise. These emotions have rooted inside of you and will need to be worked through over time. The more you practice this, the lighter you will feel.

If writing isn’t your thing, look in the mirror. Literally. When this feeling arises, look in the mirror. Make eye contact with yourself. Ask yourself the same questions listed above. Eye contact creates a deeper connection to self and you may feel emotional quicker. That is okay. Be with yourself.

Remember, you have the ability to observe yourself. Observe yourself having these emotions. Notice how your reactions are on auto-pilot. By bringing awareness to your emotional reactions you are consciously making a choice to change. This is healing. 

Download Your Free Boundary Guide

Leave a Comment